Happy Birthday Jim - May 9th, 2011

Since we moved to California, we can't visit Jim's graveside so we started an annual tradition of doing something nice for somebody.  Jim always did things for people and enjoyed it so much.  He was definitely a giver.  We had new neighbors move in recently so we baked some cookies and then went around the neighborhood collecting flowers from each one to make a beautiful bouquet.  We then rang the door bell and welcomed the new neighbors into the neighborhood with the cookies and flower bouquet.  It was good.

Four Years Without You

My precious Jim, God's precious Jim, I am having a real hard time keeping it together as the anniversary of your death approaches. I know it is a physical death. I know you are in heaven with God. But I miss you. I miss you so much. I can't believe it has been four years. Four years since I lost my soul mate. Four years since I lost the only man I truely loved. Four years since I lost my very best friend. And I still grieve for you. My heart bleeds for you. You were the person for me. Oh God, I miss him so much. I am trying hard to be a good mom, a good person, a good Christian and my life is good and I am grateful but there is still a empty place in my heart that I see no way to ever fill. Jim, I'm sad that you're not here. I'm sad that you suffered. I am sad that you died. I'm sad Emily doesn't have you as her Daddy. What a loss. God forgive me, I know that you are in complete control, that it was your plan to take Jim and I know that I/we will be ok. But I am weak especially during this time of remembering and feeling sorry for myself. God, as I walk with you, give me strength to remember Jim with happiness and not sadness. Help me to be comforted in knowing he is with you and that I will see him again and that he is watching over us. Amen. I miss you Jim.

Emily and Jim in their element.

I found a place that would digitize my 8mm tapes - imemories.com. They did a great job of digitizing the videos we had made during our time with Jim. The video below is Jim and Emily in the tub. They both dearly love the water and would take a bath for hours just playing. Jim was so patient. I ran across this while reviewing the tapes. It brought back lots of memories. Miss you Jim.