Wednesday, October 20, 2010

Emily's Birthday

Emily turned 10 years old today. She had a very special birthday and enjoyed it. She told me it was a great birthday but it still feels like something is missing - her Dad. She knows Jim is in heaven, just like I do. She is such a strong girl. But she misses him and she is sad when she thinks about him. I hurt for her. But we both know it was God's plan and we are ok with that. We just miss him. I think about all the things I miss about Jim and our life with him. The thing I miss the very most is watching him and Emily play. I always laughed so hard. They were so cute together. Jim was such a joy as a dad. He would be very proud of her. She is growing into a beautiful girl, full of spirit and goodness, very intelligent, very creative. We miss you Jim.

Sunday, May 9, 2010

Today would have been Jim's 42nd birthday. He always liked birthdays. On his 35th birthday, I threw him a surprise birthday party. He had no clue. It was so much fun. Jim was never very observant when it came to house things. My refrigerator was full of food for the party, the house was really clean, etc. He never noticed. Believe me, I have the emptiest refrigerator. You would think a bachelor lives there. I am just not good about stocking up or keeping left overs. Everyone parked down the street so he wouldn't catch on. He was so happy and thanked my later for such a great birthday party. I remember grilling steak and chicken. It all turned out perfect. I liked making him happy. I liked waiting on him. He loved for me to fill his dinner plate for him and take it to him, bring him water, a blanket, whatever. He was very good to me also. I sure miss that guy. Happy Birthday Sweet Jim. You are my sunshine.

Here is an entry I made on Jim's blog right after he went to heaven. It is a letter to Emily about her Dad. Enjoy:



Entry for May 9, 2007 Jim's 39th Birthday


To Emily,



Today is your Daddy's Birthday. He is 39 years old. You and I decided that we would go to Daddy's graveside and then to the park and feed the ducks. You told me I couldn't be sad today because it was a day of celebration and that I had to smile all day. We took Daddy a Happy Birthday balloon, tied it onto his marker and sang him Happy Birthday. You were on my back holding the umbrella because it was raining and really wet.



I want to tell you what a wonderful Dad you have.



When you were born, I think he was the happiest he had ever been. He wasn't the least bit afraid of picking up this tiny little girl. He was so happy to have you. He would hold you for hours and talk to you like you knew everything he said. It brought me so much joy to see you two together.



We worked flex hours so that we could both watch you. I worked in the morning and him from home and the evenings. Every morning you would get up in his lap and have him read to you. When you got older you would watch Jetski videos or cartoons sitting on his lap. He didn't like changing diapers but he did it and his diapers always looked neater than mine. Not sure how he did it. He had this routine when he changed your diaper that was absolutely hilarious. He would first spray the changing table and area with Lysol, lay you on a pad on the table, take his shirt and put it up over his nose and begin to change your diaper. He used to send me emails about his diaper duties. Every day when I got home, he would tell me all the cool things you did that day. He would have you make your bed and straighten your room. He never gave you sugar or candy. I guess that is why you don't care much for it now or at least at six. He taught you sign language when you were really little so you could communicate to us when you were hungry, needed more or said thank you.



When you were four, you drew a picture of Jesus and got on your Daddy's shoulders and held it up for God to see. Your Dad was so proud of you.



He loved swimming at the pool or in the lake with you. He would hold you on the kneeboard when you were just a baby and taught you to do it yourself when you were 4 or 5. He was really proud that you liked the water as much as he did. You two would swim in the coldest water. Mommy would just watch. When you got tired on the boat you would always crawl up under his drivers seat and fall asleep. He loved that.



He loved taking you to Millers Swim School when you were nine months old to take your swim lessons. He would be right there with all the mommies in the water and only have his eyes on you.



You loved Larry Boy (a VeggieTales character). When it finally wore out and you needed another one, your Daddy found you a really big one. He put it on your bed and took step by step pictures of you finding it. He then sent them to me at work. Once for my birthday, he sent me a .wave file of you singing Happy Birthday to me. I cried, it was so sweet. He said it took several practice tries. He was so patient and caring with you. I can remember several times when you didn't want to do something only to change your mind when Daddy said he was going to tickle you silly.



He loved going to your preschool class and reading Dr. Suess books. He had most of them memorized. He could make any kind of voice and did a great Donald Duck voice. When he read to you, all the characters came alive in his voice. He went to all your field trips and loved being there.



When you were 5 you would sit and watch Truck TV with your Dad and actually enjoy it. He was so proud. If you fell asleep while on his lap, he would just keep holding you until you woke up. He loved you so much.



Once he broke his ankle while Jetskiing so to have a hobby (since he couldn't jetski), he built you a huge train table and bought you a train and the landscaping to go on it. You two would work in the garage on it for several hours a week. You would always help him, whether it was working on the jetski, putting the play yard together or changing the oil in the cars.



He loved riding his BMX bike. When you were little, he would carry you in one arm and steer the bike with the other. All the kids in the neighborhood would come over and ask me if Jim could play. He would air up their bike tires, teach them bike jumps or tricks, race them - all kinds of fun things. He loved everyone of those kids and truely enjoyed spending time with them.



Your Daddy had fun and he made sure everyone else did too. I once told him that it was his fault that I was getting laugh lines because he made me laugh all the time. And there was nothing he couldn't do and most things he did better than most. He would wear himself out playing outside, at the lake, wakeboard, snow skiing, jetskiing, at whatever he did. Everything he did, he did to the fullest.



Your Daddy was a good husband also. He thought I was something and I know he loved me very much. When he went into the ICU, the last words he said to me were 'I love you.' He always unloaded the dishwasher, picked up after himself, took good care of the yard, bought me great gifts. He could come up with the neatest ways to surprise me with things. He was my best friend. I could tell him anything, anytime. He was and still is my hero.



He was very generous. I can't tell you the number of computers he reworked for people and didn't charge them. He once bought some anti-virus software for the neighbors after fixing their machine for the 4th or 5th time and never told them about it. He never talked bad about people, it just wasn't something he thought about. He was very special Emily. I am so greatful that we were able to have known him for the first six years of your life. He taught us both so much.



Emily, he was so smart. He could always figure things out. He was a great computer programmer. He and Uncle Bob could spend hours talking together about things way over my head. And he loved technology. He would always be the first to go out and buy some new gadget, the latest video or stereo equipment. He would always say, 'Don't be afraid to buy the best.'



In closing, your Daddy loved life and he lived every moment of it with no reqrets. You were the sparkle in his eyes and he so wanted to watch you grow up, teach you how to wakeboard, take you snowskiing, so many things. But God called him home. I know he is watching over us and he still has that sparkle in his eyes everytime he sees you. We'll see him again someday.



- Mommy

Saturday, March 6, 2010


I ran across this picture and had to post it. When we went camping, Jim made sure he brought all the toys. If it would have been legal, he would have added more to the back. He was such a great driver - always tried to get me to drive the camper but I never would. I would follow behind driving the boat. Miss you Jim.